Seven reasons why you constantly feel guilty about everything

Feelings of guilt can cause low self-esteem, anxiety, communication problems, and dissatisfaction with life. Moreover, many factors provoke the appearance of this feeling. Interestingly, they all indicate that you are doing something wrong. We have collected several examples of why you constantly feel guilty about everything that happens around you. 

1. You worry about the advice you give

If you tend to give others a lot of advice, and even when no one asks you about it, it is not surprising that you often feel guilty. After all, you subconsciously feel that this is your responsibility whenever someone makes a mistake by following your recommendations. 

On the one hand, the people around you always have a choice: make decisions on their own or follow other people’s prompts. And you can’t blame yourself for taking your advice. On the other hand, you can be convincing in your statements; you can put pressure on a person or force him to accept your point of view and correct his actions. 

Be that as it may, try to get into other people’s problems less. You still can’t put yourself in someone else’s shoes to see the situation for what it is. Remember a simple correspondence – the less advice you give, the less reason you have to worry. 

2. You take responsibility for the emotions of others 

You may suffer from guilt because of the habit of taking responsibility for other people’s emotions. Of course, some of your words or actions may be unpleasant or even painful for others. But each person has a choice of how to respond to external stimuli. You can take the negativity calmly or exaggerate your feelings and overestimate the potential harm caused by the interlocutor. 

Other people’s emotions are not your area of ​​responsibility. You can only control yourself and your reactions to stress. Remember that all people are different, which means that sometimes even completely harmless words and actions can be taken too close to their hearts. In addition, many people may deliberately instill in you a sense of guilt for certain actions to be able to manipulate you. 

3. You overestimate your role in events

You can sincerely believe that you influence all the events and phenomena around you. That is, if something does not go as you planned, you will lay the blame for it on yourself. Moreover, you will find reasons for self-flagellation: you will decide that you spent too little time preparing the plan, that you did not foresee all the circumstances, that you did not give your best, and so on.

The truth is that you cannot control everything around you. There are too many factors beyond your control, the amount of time spent on the task or the knowledge and skills you have. The only thing left for you is to accept that some things will happen despite your attempts to predict or change the outcome of events.

4. You can’t refuse 

If you don’t know how to say “no” to others in response to their requests, most likely, you often feel guilty. Moreover, guilt can appear when it is impossible to provide a service to a person and if you agree to help. It’s just that in some situations, you will feel guilty because of the rejection, and in some situations, because of the realization that you again put someone else’s needs first, forgetting about your own. 

Guilt will haunt you until you learn to say no without feeling like a traitor. You are one of many people to turn to for help. Appreciate yourself, your time, and your strength, and do not try to justify yourself to anyone for your refusal. Excuses are just one more reason to convince yourself and others that you are doing something wrong. 

5. You don’t live up to other people’s expectations

Surrounding one way or another, expect from you certain words or deeds. Ideally, you shouldn’t try to live up to anyone’s expectations, but in reality, too much pressure and a strong attachment to the person can make you feel guilty about it. You may fail to become what your family and friends see you as or deliberately refuse to follow their advice and life values. In both cases, there is a great risk that you will feel ashamed like a deceiver. 

To get rid of guilt, you need to clearly distinguish between what actions you do by your choice and which ones – because others expect you to. Keep doing what you want and get rid of the desire to win the love and respect of other people by indulging their desires. All the same, you will not be able to be good to everyone around you, but you can be yourself and like yourself.

6. You don’t know how to respond to criticism 

You may feel guilty when they comment, criticize your work, or try to convince you that you are making a mistake. Especially if there is a lot of criticism from others and you need to learn how to respond correctly. The most important thing you must remember is that criticism is not the ultimate truth. This is just another person’s opinion, which you can take into account and never return to it again. Stop beating yourself up for every negative comment you make. Most of them need to be more objective and be worth your attention. 

7. You are too modest and shy 

Modesty and shyness are other reasons why you may feel guilty. The thing is that these personality traits limit you in your words and actions. You do not want to once again draw the attention of others to yourself; you are afraid to make a mistake, to seem ridiculous or stupid, and therefore you often do nothing even where you need to make a decision. As a result, you feel guilty for letting the person down, not keeping your promise, or not taking advantage of the chance that was given to you. 

In this case, you need to take your self-esteem seriously. Boost your self-confidence; it will help you become more determined. Remember that the fight against difficulties is a matter of habit. At first, you may be afraid to express yourself, but after a few attempts, you will adapt and get involved in this process.